Busy writing about writing

Kinda like dental self-treatment without an anesthetic.

I am an eclectic writer. That’s the polite way to frame it. Scattered and unfocused is how the commercial writing industry would look at it. Note the word ‘scattered’. But what has always tickled my writing trigger is ideas. I spent most of my career in advertising which was a great place to earn a living when you would write, were smart, yet cursed with a short attention span. And I was a sharp-toothed evangelist about strategies. I have the case studies to back up that evangelism.

But the heart and soul of writing is ideas and the heart and soul of the characters who live in them. A key word in that last sentence is ‘soul’.

There has been a lot of concern in the creative world about AI’s impact and threat to creative livelihoods. Remember the writer’s strike in Hollywood? AI is a shitty creative writer. But if it’s formula writing? You’re in trouble. Shit spit from a blender that makes daytime writers’ programing indistinguishable from AI’s.

Almost a year ago, I had a funny idea: when else has technology annihilated creative professions? For those ancient enough to remember yellow pages, do you ever recall seeing a heading titled, “Manuscript Illustration”? And who took that profession to its unmarked graveyard?

Gutenberg.

But this is where the humor kicks in: what else did Gutenberg give us? Typos.

So I had a funny idea: what if a manuscript illustrator discovers a typo in Gutenberg’s Bible?

I typed the first word of the story on November 9, 2024. If you’re a writer, you know what happens: it consumes you. From dawn until darkness I wrote. By mid February I had completed the story. I was so excited I took the file to an Office Depot to have it printed. It cost about $50 and I three-hole punched the tome and bound it in a three-ring binder also secured from Office Depot.

I have not opened the binder. Not once. What I have opened, is my computer and the re-writing began, quickly followed by the door to the portal to the ‘What next? What now?’ universe.

And what do you do?

An online search.

And what does that do? That opens the Gates of Algorithmic Hell.

Do you want to pursue traditional publishing? Or self publishing? You’re now at the fork in the road of two Algorithmic Hells; each one with money-devouring mine fields.

There are people who spend money to have a book “published” (printed is not the same as published but we’ll leave that for another day) so they can say they ‘wrote a book’. There is a web service whose sole purpose is to write your memoir. I forget the price. A few hundred dollars ($399 comes to mind). Just answer a few questions and in a matter of days you will have your all-important memoir. All of earth’s 8.2 billion people should have one.

But soon, I will have this book out in ebook and paperback. I encourage all my ten or so of my followers to get a copy. While supplies last. With writing, you have a couple of options: POD. Or DOA.

Holy shit.

There’s actually a scene in the novel titled ‘Holy Shit’. It’s pretty funny.

I’ll keep you posted.